


The Mustache Stand-off

by crazycatt71



Series: Mustaches Vs. Duvets [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: (Bumping) Ugly Duvet Challenge, Established Relationship, Established Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Fluff and Humor, Humor, John's Mustache, M/M, Mustaches, duvets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-29
Updated: 2015-10-29
Packaged: 2018-04-28 16:22:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5097209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazycatt71/pseuds/crazycatt71
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock & John are at a stand-off about mustaches & duvets & duvets with mustaches on them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Mustache Stand-off

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for Mazarin221b's (Bumping) Ugly Duvet Challenge on Tumblr. I may have gotten carried away with the duvets.

It all started when Sherlock demanded that John shave off his mustache. His exact words were "Remove that horrible thing from your face at once John, it makes you look ridiculous." John refused. There was a lot of shouting before John yelled "It's my face and I'll have what I want on it." as he grabbed his coat and headed out the door.

After a walk and a couple of hours at a pub, nursing a pint, John headed home, determined to be the one who decided if & when he removed any & all facial hair from his face.  The flat was dark and quiet when John entered. Sherlock was stretched out on the sofa, hands beneath his chin in his 'thinking pose'.  John hung up his jacket and headed for the bedroom; fighting with Sherlock always made him feel tired. Maybe after some sleep they could talk things out like adults. John didn't really think that would happen but he could always hope.

John had expected several different behaviors from Sherlock; more shouting, sulking, being ignored, withholding sex, violent violin playing, and experiments that filled the flat with horrendous smells. What he did not expect was a duvet; specifically an duvet covered in mustaches on their bed.

      After looking and not finding the duvet that had been on the bed just that morning, he shrugged, stripped down to his pants and crawled under the ugly thing.

Sherlock was not in the flat when John came out of the bedroom the next morning so he could not ask about the duvet before he left for a shift at the clinic. He was back on the sofa when John stumbled up the stairs after working twelve hours. John had some tea and toast and headed to bed, he was working doubles all week and needed all the sleep he could get. He turned on the light and blinked his eyes a few times before realizing that no, his tired mind wasn't playing tricks on him, there was a different mustache festooned duvet on the bed. 

"Sherlock, what is up with the mustache duvets?" he asked as he walked into the sitting room.

"I thought because you liked mustaches so much that I would add some to the decor." the detective replied without opening his eyes. "You must like mustaches John, after all, there is one still on your face."

So it was going to be a stand-off then. John's mustache vs. mustache duvets. John snorted and headed back into the bedroom. Ugly mustache covered duvets were not the worst thing he'd had to endure living with Sherlock Holmes, he would survive a few nights under the things.

John worked seven more double shifts at the clinic and each night he came home to a different mustache duvet.

         

                  

He was getting tired of them but refused to say anything because he knew the only way Sherlock would stop was if he shaved off his mustache and he wasn't ready to admit defeat.  Besides, how many different duvets with mustaches on them could there be? A search on Google let him know just how long the stand-off could be. John was startled by the number of duvets with mustaches on them. He took a deep breath; he would be strong, he would win this.

That night, Sherlock stepped up his game. John went to bed under one duvet,  and woke up under another. 

After three days and nights free from duvets because they were working a case, John fell asleep in a chair in Lestrade's office at the Met and woke up covered by a now familiar item.   He groaned and threw the thing on the floor. Damn that man, how had he managed to sneak a duvet into the Met? Did he have duvet faeries working for him? Lestrade came in, saw the duvet on the floor and raised a questioning eyebrow. "Don't ask." John told him as he headed out the door in search of tea.

The next next three nights were all falling asleep under one duvet and waking under another.

                                                

 

                                                      

 

                                                 

 

 Then there was the pink faze, it lasted for five days. John almost caved but managed to stay strong after catching the smirk on Sherlock's face on the morning of the third pink day.

  

 

There were several he woke up under after falling asleep on the sofa.

 

       

 

The duvet faeries struck again when he fell asleep in the back of a cab after being awake for 60 hours on a case. He glared at Sherlock who gave his best innocent look and jumped out of the cab, leaving John to pay the cabbie. The duvet was left behind.

 

                            

 

John made through the colorful ones.

 

    

 

And the weird ones.

         

 

But when he came home from a long day at the clinic to find one that creeped him out      he gave up.

 

"You win," he told Sherlock as he entered the kitchen, "I'll shave off my mustache if you'll stop with the duvets."

Sherlock looked up from his mold cultures, a smile on his face.

"Agreed."

John turned to go to the bathroom, then turned back.

"Just tell me one thing." he said. "What did you do with all the duvets?"

"They are up in your old room." Sherlock replied. "I planned on giving them to a homeless shelter once you shaved."

"Pretty sure you'd win were you?"

"Yes."

John just shrugged, he knew when he was beat.

"Come on, I'll help you bring them all down." he said.

Sherlock followed him up the stairs, bumping into him when he stopped in the door way of his old room, staring at the small mountain of duvets piled up on the floor where Sherlock had flung them.

"How many?." John asked

"36." Sherlock replied.

John hummed appreciatively, then turned to face Sherlock, a wicked grin on his face.

"There's just one thing I have to do before I shave." John told him.

"What?" Sherlock demanded, suspension coloring his tone.

"This." John said, grabbing his arm and dragging him into the room.

He spun Sherlock around and tossed him onto the pile of duvets, quickly pinning him before he could get up. He yanked Sherlock's tee shirt over his head and pulled his pajama bottoms off. Grabbing Sherlock's wrist, he held them over the detective's head and began to rub his mustache over Sherlock's ribs. Sherlock squeaked and squirmed but John held tight. He continued tickling up one side and down the other until Sherlock was giggling and gasping for breath.

"Still want me to shave it off?" John asked as he lay beside Sherlock.

"Yes." Sherlock replied. "While I believe it could have it's uses in certain situations; it is still unpleasant to kiss you with it on your lip."

"Ok, off it goes."

John stood up and left the room. A while later he returned with a bare upper lip.

"Better?" he asked.

"Much." Sherlock told him, holding his arms out.

John joined him on the duvet mountain so Sherlock could show him how much better it was.

 

   

 

    

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to see how long the stand-off could of gone on, just google mustache duvet images


End file.
